Wanted Dead or Alive: Violent Christmas Villians!

As I sat on the loveseat in front of a crackling fire one evening after Christmas, I was struck by a horrifying realization- an unthinkably violent genocide had occurred in my house, right under my very nose! As I pieced the evidence together, I soon discovered that some monstrous blood-thirsty villains (it was so gruesome, I knew there had to be multiple perpetrators) had lain to waste a whole population of peaceful Christmas people. After some sleuthing, I determined that the crime must have occurred as follows:

WARNING: The scenes below are extremely graphic, and viewer discretion is strongly advised.

The perpetrators broke into Christmasland and wasted no time:




This angelic double homicide was the first…


Santa had gotten word and tried to stop them…



but he couldn’t even save Mrs. Claus



After the head honchos were hung, it seemed that snowpeople were particularly vulnerable:


They strung Frosty …




...then went after his head
double



His skinny brother Boris fared no better:



Boris's buddy Jack was trying to warn the others when they got to him:





Bill was caught making a run for it:


Bill’s mother Helsinka was doing housework when they got her:



and then her toddler Rinka was left defenseless:




Bored with Snowmen, they moved on to sweeter offerings…

Ira Ginger was first:




Then they got his friend:



and then his friend’s kid:






On their way to their ultimate victim, they found a kid in a sock and ruthlessly hung it:




and then his handicapped legless friend:



Finally, they found poor Rudolph, scared him white, and then hung him upside down!



Leopold, the only remaining snowman, wishes to announce that a memorial service will be offered for the victims of this tragedy on New Year's Eve. At that time, he will be releasing a star similiar to the one pictured below. He asks that you please send donations in lieu of flowers.


(Leopold during the practice for the New Year's Eve Memorial Service in honor of the slain)


A reward is offered to anyone who has any information regarding this gruesome event. It is unclear at this time as to the total number of victims. If you have any additional photos to share which you believe to be the victims of these same perpetrators, please send them via the e-mail link to this post. Valid victims' photos along with names and the circumstances surrounding their slayings will be published at a later date. We at Christmasland thank you for your cooperation in this investigation.