Happy Birthday, Stupid

Well, as you know (or maybe you don't), today is my birthday. I am 26 years old now, and this does not please me. However, optimist that I am, I was determined to have a good day of it. I scheduled myself to work just so I could be around people (if I were off today, I would have stayed at home, done laundry, cleaned something, or just sat around doing nothing) and sort of enjoy it. I actually had a decent day- I had two kids that I enjoyed thoroughly, and the pace of the day couldn't have been more perfect- I was steady so as not to be bored, but never overly busy. Some of the girls ordered Chinese for a birthday lunch. Anyway, the day was nearly over when I did something that ruined all my good birthday cheer. The conversation was as follows:

Laura to attending physician Dr. Krishnan in the conference room (joking and pointing authoritatively to a diagram of organ systems): "Oh, I'm glad you showed up, I was hoping to explain some physiology to you.."

Dr. Krishnan (laughing): "Go right ahead, I never object to being taught something new, no matter the teacher."

Laura (more serious now): "You know, the other day I made a list of all the things I want to do before I die. On that list was retaking anatomy and physiology. I really regret that I didn't pay more attention- it would have really been useful to me."

Dr. Krishnan: "Don't do that, just go to med school. You told me you wanted to anyway."

Laura: "I don't think I'd get in."

Dr. Krishnan: "Why not?"

Laura: "It's sooooo competitive. My grades were good, but not that good."

Dr. Krishnan: "Go to the Caribbean then. You'll get in."

Laura: "Nah, that's for cheaters."

Just then, a female resident who has been seated at the conference room table looked up at me and said icily: "Hmmm, that's strange. I went to the Caribbean for med school and I don't consider myself a cheater."

Needless to say, all the backpedaling and creative explanation in the world could not make me appear any less of an ass.

I guess you could call me The Birthday Ass.